Last week I posted My Fantasy Self. If you haven’t read it, it would be great if you did, but to quickly summarise it was basically a list of things that I wish I did, or that I was like. Such as being more organised, eating less junk and finishing craft projects. I wrote this quite a while a go and found it languishing on my phone and decided that January, with all the self improvement stuff going on that now was the best time to share it.
After posting it a friend on twitter pointed out that by calling it a Fantasy I was setting it up as something unreal, unobtainable. Would I be better off framing my list as my ‘Ideal Self’ instead? Ideal is much more achievable that a fantasy. Fantasy is Harry Potter, it’s Dragons and Princesses going to balls. It’s tea parties with the March Hare and Mad Hatter. It’s taking directions from the Cheshire Cat rather than learning to read a map to improve your navigation skills.
I completely understand what he was saying, it makes perfect sense and I probably should listen to him. He does seem to be a pretty together guy after all. But I’m not going to change the title of the original post. The reason for this is that when I wrote it, I think it really did feel like a fantasy. Yes, calling it my ideal self might make it more achievable sub-consciously but in that moment of typing I wasn’t expecting in any way to achieve those things.
In the time that has passed, I now do feel more like I could make a move towards those goals, those qualities that my ideal self has do seem more in reach.
Positive framing does seem like a good idea. Why set yourself up for a challenge by making something seem impossible when you could make it feel much easier with a bit of careful phrasing? I’m actually thinking that if I was to rename this I would call it my Future Self. To me, that sounds like it is going to happen. Even more concrete that the achievable ‘Ideal’. Future me will be all those things. I’ve just got to make the journey to get to her.
Ps. The super together guy with the top tips can be found on twitter by using @craigburgess. He has his own business and has recently started a DAILY podcast. I love a podcast, heck, if I had something to talk about properly I would like to start my own but I think it’s probably best to tackle the challenges and goals I’m dealing with now before taking on something like that or frankly you’ll find me rocking in a corner. In the meantime, you can check out Ask A Designer Anything, Craig’s exciting new venture right here.