I have a fantasy self. My fantasy self is like the perfect version of me. It’s sort of the me I hope I will become in the future. I don’t realistically think I can become her, and it’s not even that I don’t like myself as I am. I am awesome as I like to maintain repeatedly despite not fulfilling any of the ‘typical’ awesome criteria. Positive self image is nothing to be embarrassed about or ashamed of in my opinion, and telling myself I am awesome really does help me overall. Of course I have moments when I think I am big old pile of pathetic failure… but by being kind to myself most of the time I think that makes a difference.
Having said that, I do still have the fantasy self. The person I hope to grow up to be. Here is where I will document, mostly for my own reference to be honest, what my fantasy self is like. Maybe committing it to paper (well… blog form) will help me to achieve some of these things.
1) She watches less TV
2) And consequently reads more books.
3) And does more craft projects which she actually finishes!
4) She eats healthier snacks
5) She cooks more meals and tries new recipes
6) She has more home baked treats than shop bought
7) She sleeps better
8) She takes care of herself
9) She drinks juices
10) She doesn’t collect clutter
11) She files or throws paperwork straight away
12) She organises to meet friends regularly and in advance so it doesn’t end up being a year since she last saw someone.
13) She keeps her calendar up to date
14) She organises presents in advance
15) She keeps track of her spending
16) She is active and does regular exercise
17) Especially going out on her bike
18) She only buys nice clothes that she wants to keep for a long time
19) She has more confidence in decision making
20) She flaps and worries a whole lot less
So… 20 things. Some things of those I am doing okay at like the spending and planning my present purchase. I go through phases of being really on top of things and then falling out of the good practise. Some things I think will be easier when I move into my new house and I have more control, like the cooking and having that clean slate might help me structure my time better to do more of the activies I want to do.
Some things will take more effort for me. Like taking better care of myself and keeping the clutter down (I do have a tendency to hold onto things, which is something I am working on) but I think that with some effort I could get somewhere closer to my fantasy self. If I do get there, I’m sure the goal posts will move and I’ll want to do something else. But that’s okay, it good to try self improvement but it’s also important to be happy with who you are. Finding the balance is the goal.