Today was my last day at work before the Christmas break and boy was I ready for it. We were only actually in work for a couple of hours before heading out to the Company Christmas Do. It was a great affair: nice food, excellent entertainment (a very good Frank Sinatra tribute) a snowboard machine (like a bucking bronco) a photo booth and a present for everyone too.
I enjoyed myself but before we set off I started to get a little bit anxious. I sometimes get like this before social events which I think is quite normal and normally once I by to whatever I’m doing I feel okay. Today though I just couldn’t quite shake the feeling properly. I would go away for a bit and then rise back up. I do wish that I had been feeling better as I think I would’ve gotten more out of it but over all it was a really nice event and I am really happy that I work somewhere that puts that level of effort in. The job isn’t always the best but the people are awesome and you just can’t moan when you’re being given a free hamper!
I think the worst part was getting back to the office and everyone heading off to go for a drink and I just couldn’t do it. The anxiety was brewing again and I just wanted to go home. I felt like such a let down but sometimes you just have to do what’s best for you.
I walked through town and onto the train trying to fight back the tears. The truth is, I’m just tired. Yes I felt very anxious but I think it was brought on by being worn out. There’s no much to do at this then of year and sometimes I think it’s important to remember that it’s okay to take a step back, to take it easy and to take time out.
I’m home now, in my PJs with a cup of tea. I’ve had to turn down going to see my boyfriend’s relatives who I really like, but just couldn’t manage another two hours of putting a happy front on.
I’m not sure New Year’a Resolution really work but if there’s one I should try it’s to take it easy more.